Wednesday, September 30, 2015
Having a Crush
Those of you who have been reading this blog for a while (or my other one, that I wrote while in Singapore) know that I was in a relationship for the majority of my time in high school and the first year of university. Now I'm single again after over 3.5 years, and it's been a trip. I'm pretty sure I borrowed that phrase from my mother, but it's a good way to describe how it's been. And no, I don't do drugs.
What's weird about being single is that even though I'm not attached to anyone, I feel myself being pulled to or pushed from other people. It's a very different feeling than having someone steady that you can rely on for support, hugs and love. It seems like everyone is terrified of getting tied down or having their hearts broken, so they rely on technology to scout someone else until they are reasonably confident the person is a good idea. Even then, there's no way to prevent yourself from getting hurt in love entirely, so I've decided to accept getting hurt as a part of life and move on.
I haven't had a crush in forever, unless you count a major celebrity crush on Chris Pine. Assuming you don't (and I don't really), having a crush is such a weird feeling. I was hoping I had left behind all this nonsense in middle school or high school, but no. It's shockingly similar for better or worse. It feels like more of a game now though-- how do you know when you're texting someone too much? If they're still interested after you say something silly?